In the age of technology, our lives are intricately woven with devices that promise constant connection. Yet, ironically, this digital tether often leads to a disconnection within our most intimate relationships. As we become entangled in the web of screens, swipes, and notifications, the art of being present with our loved ones is slipping away.
Picture this: a cozy evening on the couch, a couple side by side, each engrossed in the glow of their individual screens. The occasional exchange of words is drowned out by the constant hum of notifications. This scenario is not uncommon, as our devices have become companions that share our physical space but not our emotional presence.
Even in public spaces meant for shared moments, like restaurants, the intrusion of phones is undeniable. Couples, supposedly out for a romantic dinner, place their devices on the table like silent interlopers vying for attention. A quick glance at the screen replaces genuine eye contact, and the rhythm of conversation is disrupted by the steady stream of notifications.
Public transport, waiting rooms – no space is immune to the allure of our devices. Almost everyone, except for the occasional rebel, is absorbed in the digital realm. It’s a reality check on the extent of our addiction when even moments of idle waiting are filled with the glow of screens.
A recent concert experience highlighted the depth of this disconnect. Amidst the euphoria of a Paul McCartney performance, a young couple seated nearby was more interested in curating their digital personas than soaking in the musical magic. Selfies, posts, and constant phone-checking took precedence over the shared joy of the moment. It raises the question: are we sacrificing real experiences for the virtual applause of social media?
Mindfulness, a practice encouraging us to be present in the moment, underscores the importance of detaching from constant stimulation. In relationships, this becomes crucial. Couples often find themselves caught in the web of digital distractions, struggling to give each other the undivided attention that nurtures connection.
As a relationship coach, I’ve witnessed firsthand the toll that devices can take on intimacy. The constant buzz of notifications can drown out meaningful conversations, turning genuine moments into mere background noise. Acknowledging this impact is the first step, but action is necessary.
One creative solution comes in the form of a “phone jail” – a wooden box near the front door where devices are sentenced for a designated period. It’s a tangible reminder that, at times, we need to liberate ourselves from the digital world to truly connect with the people around us. The discipline to establish boundaries is not only vital but transformative.
Recognizing our devices as EXIT routes – ways to escape the vulnerability of real connection – is a profound realisation. Setting boundaries becomes a conscious effort to close these exits and recommit to the richness of our relationships.
Imago Relationship Therapy uses concepts from a range of psychological theories and therapeutic practices and was developed by Harville Hendrix PhD and Helen LaKelly Hunt PhD in the late 1980s.
According to Imago Relationship Therapy, our early childhood experiences impact on our adult relationships. The way we were treated as children by our caregivers will become issues in our intimate relationships. If, for example, you were criticised by your father, then you will be sensitive to criticism by your partner. You can find yourself being triggered to such an extent that you cannot see the good things in the relationship.
Imago Relationship Therapy can help you to heal and understand your childhood wounds. Through counselling or attending one of the couples workshops, you can learn communication skills and the Imago Dialogue. This transformative process can lead to deep and intimate connections with your partner and save or enhance your relationships.
Imago is renowned for its dialogue technique. It focuses on building trust in relationship by teaching powerful, effective, common-sense communication skills which can quickly create a feeling of safety.
Even after just a few sessions, many couples immediately experience an opportunity to connect more deeply with their partners, helping to appreciate them more and reviving hope in their relationship.
Another focus of Imago therapy is in helping couples understand their pattern of reactivity and connection and also to ‘upskill’ the couple in relating to one another and in healthily handling and resolving conflict.
Through skilled facilitation by the therapist, the couple is able to develop a greater awareness of what keeps them apart, often stuck and feeling disconnected from each other.
By better managing these interactions and understanding the points of tension and difference, they can realise and express concerns, reclaim the joy of their relationship, better connect with each other and remember why they got together in the first place.
As part of this process they can also experience greater wholeness in their individual beings.
Imago Relationship Therapy is ground-breaking in providing both relational and individual healing and growth through one process, the Imago dialogue.
Global – Imago Relationships Worldwide
| Country | Link |
| Global | Imago Relationships Worldwide |
| Australia | The Association of Imago Relationship The |
| Austria | Imago Austria |
| Canada | Imago Relationships North America |
| Croatia | Imago Croatia |
| Denmark | Imago Foreningen I Danmark |
| Estonia | Imago Estonia |
| France | Imago France |
| Germany | Imago Germany |
| Iran | Imago Iran |
| Israel | להיותבקשר – גרינהאוס ליאורה |
| Netherland | Imago Relaties Nederland |
| New Zealand | Imago New Zealand |
| Norway | Det Norske Imago Institutt |
| South Africa | Imago Africa |
| South Korea | Imago Korea (SKAIT) |
| Sweden | Svenska Imagoföreningen |
Australia – The Association of Imago Relationship Therapists Australia
Austria – Imago Austria
Canada – Imago Relationships North America
Croatia – Imago Croatia
Denmark – Imago Foreningen I Danmark
Estonia – Imago Estonia
France – Imago France
Germany – Imago Germany
Iran – Imago Iran
Israel – להיותבקשר – גרינהאוס ליאורה
Netherlands – Imago Relaties Nederland
New Zealand – Imago New Zealand
Norway – Det Norske Imago Institutt
South Africa – Imago Africa
South Korea – Imago Korea (SKAIT)
Sweden – Svenska Imagoföreningen
Switzerland – Thérapie de Couple Imago Aftri
Turkey – Imago Türkiye
United Kingdom – Imago UK
United States – Imago Relationships North America
The Association of Imago Relationship Therapy Australia (AIRTA) is the official professional body composed of Certified Imago Therapists, trainees and Workshop Presenters trained in Imago Relationship Therapy.
Our purpose is to support our members and provide quality training and clinical supervision delivered by highly skilled trainers. We aim to uplift both our members and to facilitate the growth of Imago.
We are passionate about transforming and strengthening relationships and creating safe connection, loving and conscious paths of healing for couples and singles using the Imago Relationship Therapy Model.
The Association of Imago Relationship Therapists Australia (AIRTA) is the peak body for Imago therapists in Australia and was officially incorporated in September 2006.
Since 2005, Australia has had an affiliation with Imago Relationships International (IRI), the organisation which was founded by Harville Hendrix and Helen LaKelly Hunt.
AIRTA coordinates the directory of Certified Imago Therapists (CIT), facilitates couples workshops and also runs professional development for CIT in Australia.
AIRTA’s affiliation with IRI ensures a continuing contact with global participants who work together to meet the needs of growing regional groups and also enables AIRTA to reinvest in our region for Australian educational and support needs.
